“ Lots of folks confuse bad management with destiny. ”

“ Don't knock the weather nine-tenths of the people couldn't start a conversation if it didn't change once in a while. ”

“ Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit. ”

“ If capital and labor ever do get together it's good night for the rest of us. ”

“ Lack of pep is often mistaken for patience. ”

“ The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store. ”

“ Peace has its victories no less than war, but it doesn't have as many monuments to unveil. ”

“ Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men. ”

“ The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket. ”

“ If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. ”