“ The new year stands before us, like a chapter in a book, waiting to be written. We can help write that story by setting goals. ”

“ Much of the time, the things we feel guilty about are not our issues. Another person behaves inappropriately or in some way violates our boundaries. We challenge the behavior, and the person gets angry and defensive. Then we feel guilty. ”

“ Feel what you feel, know what you know, and set your relatives free to do the same. ”

“ What do you do when life blindfolds you and spins you around? We think it's our fault, that we're to blame, when really we should be focused on being gentle with ourselves. ”

“ Twelve-step promotes spirituality, not religion. It gives a practical, day-to-day spirituality that tells me what I can and cannot control. There is room to be imperfect and to be someone who struggles to find God. ”

“ Guilt can prevent us from setting the boundaries that would be in our best interests, and in other people's best interests. ”

“ Don't violate your own code of values and ethics, but don't waste energy trying to make other people violate theirs. ”

“ Few things can frustrate us more than trying to make a person someone he or she isn't we feel crazy when we try to pretend that person is someone he or she is not. ”

“ I gave three years of my life to take care of my dying mother who had Alzheimer's disease. Being there for her every need for three years might have looked codependent but it wasn't because it was what I wanted to do. ”

“ Some therapists have proclaimed: 'Co-dependency is anything, and everyone is co-dependent.' ”